A Happy Life May Not Be a Meaningful Life
Psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl once wrote, “Life
is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning
and purpose.” For most people, feeling happy and finding life meaningful
are both important and related goals. But do happiness
and meaning always go together? It seems unlikely, given that many of
the things that we regularly choose to do – from running marathons to
raising children – are unlikely to increase our day-to-day happiness.
Recent research suggests that while happiness and a sense of meaning
often overlap, they also diverge in important and surprising ways.
As one might expect, people’s happiness levels were positively
correlated with whether they saw their lives as meaningful. However, the
two measures were not identical – suggesting that what makes us happy
may not always bring more
meaning, and vice versa. To probe for differences between the two, the
researchers examined the survey items that asked detailed questions
about people’s feelings and moods, their relationships with others, and
their day-to-day activities. Feeling happy was strongly correlated with
seeing life as easy, pleasant, and free from difficult or troubling
events. Happiness was also correlated with being in good health and
generally feeling well most of the time. However, none of these things
were correlated with a greater sense of meaning. Feeling good most of
the time might help us feel happier, but it doesn’t necessarily bring a
sense of purpose to our lives.
Interestingly, their findings suggest that money,
contrary to popular sayings, can indeed buy happiness. Having enough
money to buy what one needs in life, as well as what one desires, were
also positively correlated with greater levels of happiness. However,
having enough money seemed to make little difference in life’s sense of
meaning. This same disconnect was recently found in a multi-national study
conducted by Shigehiro Oishi and Ed Diener, who show that people from
wealthy countries tend to be happier, however, they don’t see their
lives as more meaningful. In fact,
Oishi and Diener found that people from poorer countries tend to see
their lives as more meaningful. Although the reasons are not totally
clear, this might be related to greater religious belief, having more
children, and stronger social ties among those living in poorer
countries. Perhaps instead of saying that “money doesn’t buy happiness,”
we ought to say instead that “money doesn’t buy meaning.”
Not too surprisingly, our relationships
with other people are related to both how happy we are as well as how
meaningful we see our lives. In Baumeister’s study, feeling more
connected to others improved both happiness and meaning. However, the
role we adopt in our relationships makes an important difference.
Participants in the study who were more likely to agree with the
statement, “I am a giver,” reported less happiness than people who were
more likely to agree with, “I am a taker.” However, the “givers”
reported higher levels of meaning in their lives compared to the
“takers.” In addition, spending more time with friends was related to
greater happiness but not more meaning. In contrast, spending more time
with people one loves was correlated with greater meaning but not with
more happiness. The researchers suspect that spending time with loved
ones is often more difficult, but ultimately more satisfying, than
spending time with friends.
When it comes to thinking about how to be happier, many of us fantasize about taking more vacations or finding ways to avoid mundane tasks. We may dream about skipping housework and instead doing something fun
and pleasurable. However, tasks which don’t make us happy can, over
time, add up to a meaningful life. Even routine activities — talking on
the phone, cooking, cleaning, housework, meditating, emailing, praying,
waiting on others, and balancing finances — appeared to bring more
meaning to people’s lives, but not happiness in the moment.
More broadly, the findings suggest that pure happiness is about
getting what we want in life—whether through people, money, or life
circumstances. Meaningfulness, in contrast, seems to have more to do
with giving, effort, and sacrifice. It is clear that a highly meaningful
life may not always include a great deal of day-to-day happiness. And,
the study
suggests, our American obsession with happiness may be intimately
related to a feeling of emptiness, or a life that lacks meaning.
